Think Twice

Okay so forewarning this post might be a little morbid for some but I find it perfectly in keeping with my "being mindful" theme for the summer. When we had trinity's slumberparty last saturday we decided to sleep blake in our room on the floor. Two girls in the bunk and two girls on the floor seemed max capacity for the bedroom trin and blake share. Well, of course he didn't want to sleep on the floor but in bed with us. (those of you that know me know I BARELY share my bed space with my husband, I am VERY SELFISH about my bed space) =). Still it was obvious that blake wasn't going to take no for an answer that night so I left it to Jer to check every once in a while on the girls while I layed down with Blake. (I was exhuasted anyways!) As we lay next to each other I thought to myself "he is NEVER going to sleep if I am facing him, he will want to play with my face/hair/ etc. and we will be up all night so I turned away from him. We were back to back. Then I had the thought, what if? what if this were our last moments together alive? (morbid I know but don't we all have thoughts like that scattered throughout our fly-by days?) I thought, "I would never forgive myself if I turned my back on him for the sole reason that he go to sleep faster and I never got to touch his precious little face again or feel him reach out smilingly and poke at my face with his still-slightly-chubby toddler hand". Of course I shrugged it off about as soon as I thought it but in the end I couldn't resist, I had to roll over, face him and just watch him. He was already asleep on his back when I turned and a moment later his sweet little hand fell softly to my side. I lay there holding his little hand; amazed at what I had and what I could lose, I was simply grateful for the moment. A time-stopping moment. That's why I had to share. Please, enjoy your moments.

Dash Point

Today we went to Dash Point. On the sound about 10 min. from Federal Way, it is apparently an old stomping ground for my husband. When he was little his whole family would camp there in the summer. It wasn't quite as cool as I was expecting but it wasn't bad either. You know how childhood memories have a way of making places/things a little more "special" in your mind than they are in reality. Nevertheless he seemed to enjoy telling me about the gooey ducks he would dig and the boards they like to "glide" on. Something like a mini surfboard that you toss onto very shallow water and jump on, skimming for several feet at a time. We saw some guys doing it today but I didn't get a picture. it did look like fun. It started out a little cloudy but the sun came out and I was shutter happy! So here are a bunch of pictures of random things that I am sure will bore you but filled my hour with "click, click, click" happiness. I do love getting outside.

silly face!

he really was laughing. . .

looks like a dolphin

living muscles! sweet.

can't resist these kids half out of frame pics

seagull fodder

no not a fossil, yes dead, totally cool

those catchy little phrases

Titus 2:11-14 "For the grace of God that brings salvation has appreared to all men. It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope - the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickendness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good."

People I have discovered a dirty little secret. the phrase. . . "It's just a guilty pleasure of mine". ZAP! POW! What does that mean?! alright, so maybe comic book effects aren't quite called for. However, someone I really like on a certain social site was posting that they were lamenting the loss of their current season of "women who stay at home in a city near new york" (just in case she reads this) or some other such NONSENSE show. They were asking "what can fill my time over the summer till more NONSENSE comes on in the fall??".  My answer? say NO to TV and find your fun elsewhere. First off, I am going to admit I have used that exact phrase about my InStyle magazing subscription and I do watch So You think You can Dance so please understand I am not immune and most likely need a treatment of my own medicine. In reading that post, I just realized that something about the guilty little pleasure thing lit a little fire under me. As believers we are called to be careful of the content that goes into our minds and as the scripture above states the grace of God (not to mention the Holy Spirit) teaches us to say "No". So how come I am spending my spare time (yeah right who has that?) "escaping" into these reality shows that often espouse the very worst of human nature and intent? Greed, anger, slander, brawling, obscenities, this is all from a list in Ephesians 5 that we are to avoid. Sounds pretty much like the central theme of these shows doesn't it? So what calls us to park ourselves in front of something we are clearly called to avoid? well that's easy, they get pretty clothes, they have gorgeous homes and cars, attend partys and galas, and live the high life. They get to act exactly how they want and heck with the repurcussions. Isn't that fun? Isn't it sparkly? Isn't it. . .ridiculous? Need I remind us the only thing that matters when I stand face to face with my maker are the actions I TOOK, the decisions I MAKE. Did I spend time pining for the things I couldn't have or living vicariously through a tv dream version of life or did I "spend my time on things above" so to speak. This is not a judgement, simply a call to look at the "guilty little pleasures" in our lives. Are they really just little? what do they lead to? how do they influence me? are they worth it? We toss the phrase not even considering what the words in it are. Why is it guilty? becuase we should not be doing it. What sort of pleasure? usually material or carnal. Come on people, let's re-examine the ease with which we accept the things of this world. Put some good music on, read a book that doesn't have to do with earlthy desires, PRAY, read the bible, find a way to serve, there are limitless options. Now these may not allow the mental "escape" we seek but certainly there are shows/movies/music/etc that can fit into that category without scratching all of our sin nature itches. Just be MINDFUL. that is my goal. Watch your attitude, is it affected by your time with the tube? In all things as our pastor says "be careful. . .",   so be careful everyone. . . .

Trinity's Birthday

My once little Trinity just turned six this past saturday! and (drumroll please). . . . . she had her first sleepover! two cousins and one friend equaled a total of four happy little girls. The girls arrived around four and we made princess crowns and other fun girly crafts. Then a spaghetti dinner and we packed into the van to meet some other friends at Krispy Kreme for ice cream and doughnuts. Then it was back home for popcorn and movie time. On sunday morning we took them all to church and then returned them home. I think they had a great time all around. No one asking to go home, no tears, no fights. Of course there was plenty of tattling and some disputes but nothing I couldn't handle. Whew! Here are some pics from the big day. (oh and a shout out to lili who was born the same day as my darling daughter; we enjoyed your party earlier in the afternoon, thanks for the invite!) Also, thank you to all everyone who sent cards. (grandparents, great grandparents, uncle brian and nancy jane, and anyone else I might have missed). Thank you Morgyn and Amie for the gifts! Trinity bought all sorts of fun stuff and decorated her vanity the next day.

cards from loved ones and her crown craft

please let's not have ice cream all over you in your pictures

she had a #6 candle

ooooh! what could it be?

blakey enjoying the party

a little excited about the present?

cousins zoe and hailey

movie time

Inception

Jeremy and I went to the movie Inception last night. It is as good as the hype surrounding it! I was struck by the thought that all of science cannot produce what movie makers can. Isn't that interesting? We all posit what the future may be like and science shows are filled with searching the stars for planets and theories on how many dimensions we may or may not be living in but it is films that bring such concepts to life. I love that inception wasn't a robot world filled with automated everything, it could even feel like current time except for the fact that no one has technology like that in our time; yet. No, instead it dealt with a very real part of life, our dreams. Jeremy and I excitedly discussed the "shared dreaming" idea. Of course never for a bad dream, but what would it be like to experience the very real feeling that we had been somewhere completely outside our norm together in a dream world? Dreams are powerful in that they make you feel like you are truly in that dreamworld; to not have to shake your loved one in the night to attempt to describe the vivid details of a fabulous dream but instead to experience it WITH them would be AMAZING. Call me a nerd. Anyway, the whole thing was incredibly suspenseful and there was much I am sure I missed and many things that I was left pondering. Mostly not all of my "how's" were answered. That isn't the point in a movie like this of course. It was enough for me to watch it and feel a connection to the characters and simply be inspired by the possibilities. Congrats to the director for creating a unique experience for movie goers and for yet again making future concepts a stunning visual reality. In that sense, you all are one giant leap ahead of the rest of mankind and I love it!

Only Jesus Satisfies

Here is my latest song. Think country western with fiddle interludes between measures. Guitar driven with full on gospel choir at the hymn snippett. Fun stuff if I can ever get some musicians to help me out. I hear it all, just can't play six instruments. =) I could certainly rock the tambourine however, and I plan to!Sort of botched the ending, haven't settled on one yet.

Good for You

Don't drink enough water? Buy yourself an adorable travel cup! I find it so much easier to re-fill it and keep drinking when I smile every time I pick it up. Isn't it cute? Also, I am obsessed with the book STUCK by Anneli Rufus. It's a must read. All about how the past affects the present, how to live in the present while not getting stuck in it, and looking towards the future. She covers such a range of histories and emotions and I just find myself thinking "she is me!"  Great summer read to keep you motivated to live life to the fullest! Haven't finished it yet so better get back to it.

Terrible Beauty

I have previously posted this poem but now it has morhped into a song so I am re-posting it with the video. Not great quality so try to read along, only a few words have been changed. . .thanks! There are about four people I specifically had in mind when writing this. Not to mention the suffering of haiti, the grief of sudden loss, etc.



Terrible Beauty

who can say why the unspeakable happens?
how the innocent are hurt.
the physical wounds that torture the soul;
how do you recover?

is there purpose in the pain?
how do You explain that the
terrible can be beautiful?

the buildings fall and people scream,
creation groans in agony
some are found but most are lost,
how do we believe?

that there is purpose in the pain?
can You really make
the terrible, beautiful. . .

medicine that cannot heal
accidents that make us reel with broken dreams and bodies
desperate hearts that make wrong choices
sicknesses that stop our voices
and rob us of our memories

and I just want You to take it all away
but without this terrible pain,
we wouldn't have stood to gain

the way You take a heart that's torn
and in Your mercy You transform;
You take the terrible, and give them beauty

from loved ones lost, a testimony
for hurt ones healed, a hope of glory
to those who fall, a chance to rise again

there is purpose in the pain
I see it over and over again
and I know I wouldn't be who I am
if it weren't for such terrible beauty

My Sister's Songs

Okay so some of you know that my sister and I are attending a worship summit in November and we have committed to write five songs apiece. As I labor on my third she is up to about six. Yeah, nice right? I simply say she has the gift of songwriting and God just gives me a song now and then as a gift. I am so excited by her focus and productivity. They are all REALLY GOOD as well. Just thought I would put up a few of them so you can enjoy at least the words. Sometime if she ever records them I will add the youtube link. Please note all lyrics are copyrighted. thank you!

YOUR LOVE IS AMAZING!

                                               Open up my eyes, peer through the darkness

Knew it was gonna be just one of those days

I'd rather pull the covers back over my head, and just hide away

But then I hear You still small voice saying,

“Come and seek me first, we could have such a good day!”

Chorus:

And now the sun is shining I feel its warmth on me

I feel my spirits rising, Your love has set me free

Here in this quiet moment, when I can be with You

I'm here to tell you that Your love is Amazing!!!

Halfway through my day and I'm so tired

feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders

somehow I've got to find the will to carry on and push through it all

but then I hear Your still small voice saying

“come and be with me” and I'm reminded that this is Your day

Your day to rejoice in!

Chorus

And now the day is gone and night has come, the darkness is falling

but You have shown Your light into my night and I've nothing to fear

as I hear Your still small voice saying “Come and rest in me”

I lay my head down on a pillow of grace

PRAISE HIM!

(this one is mostly snippets of psalms)

Chorus:

Everybody come, everybody come!

everybody sing, everybody sing!

Everybody come and lift up His Holy Name

everybody come, everybody come!

everybody sing, everybody sing!

Everybody lift up His Holy Name

Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil, for You are with me

though I'm tossed in the waves of this ocean life, I'll let the stormwinds blow! Still You are with me

Chorus

In the night watch You are my rock, my strength, my fotress and my mighty tower, and You are worthy

and if my heart and flesh may fail Your strength remains, my lips will always sing Your praise 'cause

You are worthy!

Chorus

bring an offering of thanks to the Lord our God for He is good and His mercy endures forever

for the Lord is great and greatly to be praised, in the beauty of His Holiness. . . that endures forever

Chorus

The Earth is the Lord's and all it's fullness, the world and those who dwell therein, Praise Him.

And if we do not stand and lift Him high, even the rocks will cry, Somebody Praise Him!

Chorus

 

ONLY JOY

Never thought I'd find myself here like this

I can only wonder at Your holiness

There could be so many questions but it's not my story to write

I'd rather trust in You

Bridge: And You will be my comfort and I will rejoice

I have found Your will for me and it gives me pleasure

to worship You in all You do, is why I'm here

in this place of pure surrender I find peace

as I stand in awe of You

Bridge: and You will be my comfort and I will rejoice

Chorus: I won't be afraid to see You my God

I won't be afraid to fall into Your arms

to hear You say my name, calm my fears, no more tears

only joy, only joy!

when my days upon this weary earth are spent

I am but a vapor gone in a moment

You were the source of every good thing in my life

now I give it back to You

Bridge: and You will be my comfort and I will rejoice

Chorus: I won't be afraid to see You my God

I won't be afraid to fall into Your arms

to hear You say my name, calm my fears, no more tears

only joy, only joy

only joy, only joy!

Playing with my new camera

I got a new point and click for my birthday. Nothing special but I did have fun taking some cool shots of our fire e used for smores and my moms solar lamps in her yard. The first shot of her globe is with the flash so you can see what the glass looks like. In the dark it turns colors. of course, I don't really edit any of my photos so they could be better I am sure.

after all, isn't family everything?

my brother randy and his whole family flew in for the fourth. hence my running back and forth across the state all week. after the holiday with jer's family I headed straight back to mom and dads for a few more days to visit with them. It was wonderful to have the oppurtunity to spend time with them since I know we can't afford to fly to cali this year. What was also nice was that they had no ties to any schedule like they do when we visit them. Teenagers have CRAZY schedules! This was about the most laid back family visit ever and super enjoyable. I love you guys and miss you already! some highlights are posted here: trying to get all the cousins for a pic (ha!), "fireworks" (mainly sparklers and smoke bombs - does that even count?), and family time around the firepit (okay so this is a MUST try - first - go to whatever store you have to and purchase toasted coconut marshmallows, second - roast and smoosh between two keebler round chocolate frosted cookies, third - die and go to goodie heaven).

perfect of everyone except evelyn who was pouting and I have no idea why! Just going to crop her out. stinker. =)

I like the way the

three girls sort of domino backwards - - - jadeyn and trinity are so cute together!

Blake was IN LOVE with the sparklers. a pyro if I ever met one. . .Pryo #2

Thanks Josh for making the smoke bombs a little more interesting. hee hee