Loss and Love

On Saturday we almost lost Isaac. He had been playing outside with friends and unbeknownst to anyone he had closed himself in our new van and was unable to get out. We think he was in there for almost an hour before anyone realized that he was not with another member of the family. Lured by our new ride he thought he would play for a while. Yes, it was parked outside and yes, it was a sunny day. I have no doubt if it had been a good ten degrees hotter we could have lost him. After Jeremy and I searched the house and couldn't find him I headed outside thinking to look up and down the street and opened the van door purely as a just in case and there he was climbing out from the back row to me, covered in sweat, with pink cheeks and tears in his eyes. I can't tell you how close I held that sweaty child as I calmly walked him in the house telling him that he was okay now and we would take a bath to wash the sweat off, and don't you worry mommy will teach you how to open the doors so that never happens again. I could see in Jeremy's eyes as I brought Isaac in and told him where I had found him that he understood the seriousness of the situation perfectly well. I'm just so thankful that that we were spared the possible awful outcome of this situation. When I asked him what he had been doing he said he had laid down, which really made me sick to my stomach to know that he had already hit that point where he had resolved to wait quietly and rest into sweet oblivion. There were even neighbor children out playing that had no idea he was in there! So, lock your doors family people when your car is parked outside. Prevention is key. Teach your little how to get out of a car and when they can't get out to lay on the horn incessantly. It takes such a little time to lose so much.

As these thought were keeping me awake I reflected on something else that has been shouting it's importance to me lately. Not neglecting intimacy in your marriage. My sister had shared recently how she has to be careful trimming my dad's neck (yes when he left his barber he decided she could be the new one lol) because the skin at the hairline has become looser and nicks more easily than the firmer skin of her husband. We moved on in the conversation but last night I was laying there looking at Jeremy's shoulders and neck while he was beside me and my mind went back to our honeymoon and how I could have just looked and looked at him for hours and not been bored. Knowing every pore on his face and freckle on his shoulders was a delight. And I noticed that his skin is still perfectly smooth. Into my mind came Proverbs 5:18 "Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth" Yes, after thirteen years of marriage this year we are still comparatively young. If you are in a season of babes and toddlers and mayhem, I would just encourage you not to to forget your spouse. You are young NOW and not forever and while enjoyment means many different things at many different ages you cannot deny that we are in the prime of our sexual lives and should be striving to rejoice in each other and the intimacy our youth affords! Whenever I am tempted to think this is something I can work on later I remember the line from a book I read early in my marriage that said "you are his only legitimate resource". It has always stuck in my head as a powerful reminder of our commitment to love and honor each other. Just as he respects my boundaries when intimacy is last on my mind, I have made myself available on some of those nights simply for that reason. And it is healthy to do so. Putting your spouse first is basically half of the fifth chapter of Ephesians and that circle of submission goes both ways.

So teach your children to get out of cars and don't wait to work on intimacy in your marriage until your youth has suddenly passed you by. Or another way to think of it would be remain faithful in your marriage, keep the connection close and guard yourselves. Familiarity is considered boring these days but as we all know spouses still have the power to surprise and delight so hang on to that beautiful person you've known for so so very long (eye roll) and don't take them for granted.