Church and Children - Today's Dilema

Top 10 reasons children leave the church

This is so on point! It's exactly what I have worried about for my children's "church" future. When I grew up in church I occasionally had sunday school and I loved it but that was not the rule. What church taught me was to sing. Then we took that small joyful skill and we ministered to homeless people and other local churches. It was foundational to my faith and let me tell you we were not catered to but expected to glean from the messages what we could even at a young age. The sermons I listened to had theology (Dan) doctrine and historical content/context (Tim Tyler) and morals/values (Russ Bell). These combined to give me a deeper appreciation of my faith. I sat among different generations and saw that God was real to them and Jesus was the only Saving One. Even with a church raising more in keeping with the authors goals I still went through every struggle he mentioned of finding authentic community experience outside the church that tugged at me. Doubts caused by an onslaught of philosophical dogma that lead in the opposite direction of humble faith. Even the things I took for granted about the Word (inerrant) swayed with the reasoning of the scientific minded. I had to slog through all those situations and I agree with the author, I'm not sure I would have held my ground if I had come out of today's church style/living. That is a minor issue with our current church for me. I get the pastor's point that we shouldn't pretend we don't live in the culture we do. So I take the silly film clips they often open the service with with a grain of salt. After all, as an adult I do have some discernment in that area and you know I have seen most everything they show. When I see the "meet them through the culture" in youth/children's programming however I have an instant red flag in my heart. When we first went to church on the ridge I was frankly overwhelmed with their children's areas. I feel inadequate to "keep up with the Joneses" as it is in my own home but here the children have every contraption known to man at their fingertips in the church building! On Sunday night Jeremy and I went to the walk through of the new property (a God thing for our church family) and our pastor was really excited about the new children's ministry and kept saying things like "big screen TV's" and "tricked out". I think elementary age children don't have the discernment to guide them about what is social culture and what is church culture and when they look so much the same how is there any "transformation by the renewing of their minds" happening? For example I think it more powerful for a child to attend a children's program where they realize "this is different than my home, my school, my usual, and I think I like it"., You know what I mean? Does that mean it won't be fun or interesting or speak to kids of the current culture? Absolutely not! Isn't the Word relevant today? Absolutely! Does it really take a ton of money shelled out on a kickin' building to keep our children interested in God? Couldn't that money be better spent teaching the kids the power of ministry? Creating margin in their own church environment by a less is more philosophy that might allow them a more tangible way to "reach" the lost by actually using that money in the community?  Perhaps ministry skills being taught (like choir or something) could create true outreach, learning hard facts about the real world while enjoying the blessing of sharing Christ's love. Planting a garden and helping the parents work it and providing the fruits to the local food banks, etc. I am telling you from experience that your kids don't need to be middle schoolers to appreciate the impacts of their effort. They instantly realize they are making a difference and it provides them a profound sense of satisfaction and worth. Okay, the church can't teach them everything and that's why Trin and I  volunteer at Eastside Baby corner. I want the kids to develop a heart for the lost and struggling. That can be fostered both in and outside the church but when everything is just "cool" and "fun" about loving Jesus at church I feel that a great opportunity is lost to build our children's foundation in the faith. Can you tell he's hit my soapbox subject on this? I don't want to be legalistic ever but I have higher expectations for children's ministry than outfitting it with xboxes and wiis you know what I mean? Those kids need to find something DIFFERENT there. Most of them could care less about the accouterments if they feel they are getting something of value (hopefully knowledge of Jesus and attention/love from caring leaders).  It's a tough situation but leadership really needs to start looking at the statistics and take a hard look at how things are done in children's ministry. This is the tip of an iceberg people so please don't think this is a comprehensive or final say sort of post. Just my rant on an important issue currently facing my family and our decision-making. Last but not least I do have my children in our local church programs and I am so thankful to the leaders and volunteers that pour the love of Jesus into my children each week. This is not a judgement on you in any way be assured!